The Ska Band costs HOW MUCH?!

Php 30,000... Said an office buddy who used to be in Brownbeat. (But now does industrial rock ... and getting married too! How cute!) That's cause there's like ten of them in the band.

Somebody please pick my jaw up from the floor.

But now for some good news, the invites are now semi-finished! Here is a prototype, designed by me and one of my bestest friends in the office, a very talented art director. We originally planned to print the French text on one side and then the English translation on the flip side, but when she went home I put both texts together, half and half, and I think it doesn't look half bad :)

UP NEXT: The dress.

Cluelessnesses

No sleep and all play makes stripeysocks a dull gurl gril gerl. So with very little sleep, I set off with my brother in our trusty car to scope out some recommended wedding venues south of Manila.

Now, just to be clear, I do know that weddings are expensive. That was why I wanted a very simple one. Him and Me, some food, lots of drinking, women jumping after the bouquet - simple. But imagine my surprise when one guest relations officer showed me the cost estimate for their caterer's package: P210K. And since there is only one package and you can only upgrade the menu, that meant I would be entitled to the following:

1) doves in a cage
2) a limo
3) a torch parade (eh? santacruzan?)
4) lots of pretentious crap I don't need

Too bad, I liked the view. And they said the venue was free... but you had to get their caterer. Boo.

Back at work, they told me it was actually a steal and I was crazy to think I could get a lower deal anywhere. But I'm not paying for anything I don't need.

The day after that I went to the bridal fair and took some flyers. Man, makeup is expensive too! And what is up with lumping everything up in a package? "P10K makeup for 3 people plus the groom." The groom doesn't need to look like a drag queen, I DO!

So, with a cheerful heart, I trudge on in the quest for the perfect wedding venue. And a dress. Good lowrd, the dress. I have 5 months left.

Crazy Schemes!

When I tell people I want a red, white and blue wedding, I get a few raised eyebrows. My friend/invite designer actually drew up this color scheme to maybe persuade me to think things over:

Gah! But I'm sticking to my color scheme for a reason.

No, our nuptials won’t fall on the Fourth of July nor on Philippine Independence Day, we are not that patriotic. (But we did sing our national anthems to each other on our second date.) Sure, it’s not your typical motif - and thank God it’s not, because I don’t want someone else's wedding - Anyone who knows me won't take me for a traditional bride anyway - and maybe even laugh at any attempt to be one.

While some girls dream in pinks and baby blue hues, my palette is inspired by the rebellious red of my chucks, the deep blue of the ocean that separates us, and the pristine white of the slopes I saw outside the window on our first day as fiance and fiancee.

The Red, the White and the Blue.

The dreamer from France and the spaced-out chick from the islands (whom his friends liken to a burst of sunshine…)

It’s not as tacky as you might think.

from bliss event group

from junebugweddings

Plus the dream shoes, because I WILL learn to walk in heels!!!!

 

from shoesforlady

And in honor of my flag, there will be a little yellow too - but I'm saving that story for later ;)

Manila and the Bachelorette

Went to a friend's bridal shower last night. Friendship clause prevents me from divulging what went down, but we had a gay olde tyme.

It's funny to see everyone pairing off and settling down one after another. We all knew each other when we were dumb kids making stupid mistakes and having our hearts broken and trampled on on a regular basis. Doesn't mean we aren't the same dumb kids anymore, but I guess now we know better to stay away from people who break our hearts and stick with the person who truly loves us. It's hard and frustrating, but it all pans out in the end. Or we could at least hope.

I had an early shoot this morning, but trust me not to get up on time. While waiting for the camera crew to set up and for the hosts to get their makeup done, a walk around Binondo revealed that I still haven't discovered all of Manila's impressive sights. Like many Pinoys, I never get to see all of the city's hidden splendor... mostly because there are so few left and they are so well hidden under the guise of neglect.

I entered the empty post office in Liwasang Bonifacio that Sunday, too. The lady guard gave me a wary look but let me in, curious why anyone would want to go inside a closed, dirty old building anyway "just to see it." About two minutes later, she followed me inside to turn the lights on - which I said were unnecessary, you could see well enough even with the doors closed. It was designed to let in light. Besides, I only wanted to touch the iron grills and the banisters that stood there when my grandfather migrated to Manila, and see the ceilings and walls that defied the second world war, and touch the tables where my father maybe sent a few letters himself. Tacky drapings on the ceiling and bad paint job aside, the building does not cease to amaze.

It is bittersweet to see the decaying city's beauty again on my last year here. Manila, I hope that when I see you again you will have found a person who will really love and care for you. Or we could at least hope.

A mock wedding and French Marriage Visa Requirements

The original plan, as discussed with my lawyer/groom, was to get married in his parents' adopted town 5 hours from Paris (first at the town hall and then immediately after, at the church down the street) and then have a party at their lawn which annexes to a forest. After that I go back, finish the year at work while organizing the Philippine leg of the H&M Marital Mystery Tour which may or may-not-be in January of 2011. 

This plan fits in perfectly with getting the requirements for a resident card in their sequential order (if you want a wedding in France, that is):

1) get a short-stay marriage visa (3 months only) to get a marriage license which makes it easier for you to -

2) get a long-stay visa (1 year, and it's free when you're a missus!) which is necessary to -

3) obtain a Carte de Séjour or residence card

In a meeting with a Filipino consul in Paris last month, I was told we didn't need to get married again in the Philippines because the marriage certificate inked in France would do. But I wanted a ceremony in the Philippines too, because I didn't want a wedding party without them witnessing a wedding. I wanted a reason to celebrate!

So yesterday, my friend J told me I don't really need to get married again in the Philippines. I can get by with a "mock" wedding, where we dress up and act out the ceremony with a pastor. Another friend, The Attorney had a similar idea, in his legal opinion there is no need to get married here again but we could have a mass held so we can renew our vows in front of friends and family. This saves me from dealing with bureaucratic poop-cedures!

Now all I need is to file my Visa de court séjour pour mariage en france avec un ressorissant Français or Short-term Visa for marriage in France with a French national. Here are the documents I need (translated from the embassy website with the help of H, because there is no English list):

FROM MOI (me)

1) An accomplished form downloaded from the French embassy

2) A passport valid for at least 6 months

3) A copy of the page of the passport with the picture and the page with extensions of validity and changes of names or surname

4) The certificate of the publication of banns and no opposition to the wedding delivered by the town hall where the ceremony is to take place

5) Proof of my personal income (bank account and if necessary, the last 3 salary sheets)

6) A return plane ticket

7) Medical insurance for 90 days

FROM LUI (him)

8) Proof of French nationality (ID card)

9) Proof of income (the last income tax sheet, or the last 3 salary sheets)

10) Proof of lodging (the title of property to his flat)

11) Proof of means of subsistence and housing (attestation d'accueil, less than 3 months old)

12) Letter from the fiance confirming his intent to marry me and stating how we met (how nosy!)

13) A copy of his passport and the pages with the Philippine entry stamps

14) and my pictures

I read somewhere that you could get a long stay visa for marriage and then stay in France to get a carte de séjour and never have to look back (which I won't do anyway, I actually like my home) but my correspondence with the visa consul dashed all hopes by saying the process I just gave is now the only way to do it legally. 

I'm sure there are still loopholes out there. Like getting a short-stay visa then getting married and then asking the prefecture for a carte de sejour, but then the requirements to get a long-stay visa and to get a marriage license are the same anyway, so why risk it? Your first marriage is special, so it's best that you do it right the first time :)

Three Brides and a Zombie

Two friends are getting married this year, L this February and A in June... little did I know that would join the fray so soon!

After a month on vacation I saw both of them again last night, but had very little chance to talk since a little snafu at the office held me hostage until 9:30pm. L was so much thinner from the diet and the preparations but had to fly off early for her morning show, and A sat so close to her groom J the whole time... aww. It's great to see them together again.

A & J did all the wedding preps themselves, TOGETHER. J gave me a great idea to make my paperwork woes disappear (but more on that later). They asked me last night if I could make the flowered stretch headbands for the kids on the entourage and of course I said yes!

This is one of the stretchy headbands I made for friends this christmas which I suppose they found cute, modeled by friend JV:

But seeing A&J had me wishing H wasn't from a different planet. I'm planning the wedding here with friends because I can't leave my job and H is assigned to plan the French wedding (his mom is really doing most of it!) because he can't leave his job, but it's so hard to decide on the colors and the location and the menu! White dress vs yellow dress? Band vs. DJ? I keep changing my mind every day! And I can't call him anytime because of the time difference: his night is my day and my day is his night. Hardest of all, he was so sad last Monday because he missed me but we can't hug through Skype. I wish real life was like the Take on Me music video. We can't be together until summer, in 6 aggravatingly protracted months. Lordalmighty. Somebody please invent a teleporter already!

I finished the evening (more like started the morning) with friends M and O, drinking a pitcher of zombie out in the street, toasting to loves lost, love found, loves yet to be and finding a path through the labyrinth. M promised to host my wedding too, woohoo! At least that's one thing off the list :)

How to make a zombie:

1/2 oz 151-proof rum
1 oz pineapple juice
1 oz papaya or orange juice
1/2 apricot brandy
1 tsp sugar
2 oz light rum / white rum
1 oz dark rum / golden rum
1 oz lime juice

Blend everything with ice except the 151. Pour into a glass. Float the 151 on top. Garnishing is a waste of time. I read on wikipedia that you could light this up, so grab a lighter and enjoy.

How It Began

A little over 5 years and a heartbreak ago I made a list of what I want in a man, put it in a box and waited until he came. That list included quirky things like "doesn't have a funny last name," "will give me a flower for no particular reason," "will kiss me under the moon," and a sample drawing of his haircut.

2 years and a hangover later I found it again, realized I had settled for less and burned it. And then I met him. The man I thought I only made up in my mind. And now we are getting married! Oooooh! And I can't stop smiling! But I should mention we are getting married three times in 12 months too. Oh yes we are. Twice in his country and once in mine. Seems like a fun thing to do. Seems easy too... Or maybe until I wake up a day before the wedding, unwashed and stressing over table settings, we'll see :)

Before all that though, I have a mountain of paperwork to sort out. We come from different countries so we have to jump more than the usual bureaucratic hoops. A very perceptive friend told me yesterday: "Why can't they just be happy for you?" And it's actually the best comeback against any consul or government clerk who stands between me and my papers: "Why, you got something against true love?" (More on this later.)

Et alors,

Welcome to my new blog. The wedding blog. In the next entries you will know more about me & H, our families, our friends and how we plan to accomplish the impossible: turning me into a bride!